The Happy Coach

My friend and I recently went on a 3 week holiday up the east coast of Australia. We flew to Sydney for a couple of nights, then flew to Byron Bay. And of course, a stay in Byron Bay is not complete without the obligatory 'trip' to Nimbin.

Enter 'The Happy Coach'. We went to a tourist info centre that ran two tour buses to Nimbin, one 'conservative' bus took passengers to a candle factory and to look at native aboriginal stuff, the second, more 'radical' alternative was the Happy Coach. The lady in the shop wouldn't specify why it was radical, we were expected to fill in the blanks for ourselves.

We were picked up outside our amazing flashpackers (if you are ever in Byron looking for cheap, clean accommodation with all mod cons including plasma TV, I recommend Nomads) by a very dodgy looking dude. His name was Fred and he had the most intense stare of anybody I have ever met. I guess it was all part of his act, but first thing in the morning it was a little too much to take. He was wearing clothes that looked like he'd been sleeping in them for the last week; a saggy stained wifebeater, some kind of cutoff cargo pants, and a long mane of dirty dreadlocks down his back. He definitely fit the part of a seasoned stoner and I knew we were in for a bumpy ride.

After Fred had picked up all the passengers and we were suitably concerned by his dodgy demeanour, he proceeded to give us a rundown of what the journey to Nimbin would involve. He relayed his jokes with candour and put in a good effort, considering he has probably said those same words a million times over. Something along the lines of, if you don't like my driving close your eyes, and if you notice my eyes are closed, don't worry the road is in the same place it was yesterday. Typical Aussie dry wit - love it :)

The range of people on the bus was interesting, lots of young American/Canadians but also a few middle age Europeans and a local who was just hitching a ride. Fred blasted the stereo and surprisingly I was in love with the soundtrack. Every song was upbeat and 'who gives a fuck' in its mentality, stuff like Aussie hip hop band 'Butterfingers' and Bob Marley.

We stopped at Minyon falls and Nimbin Rocks on the way (yawn) but really the whole reason anybody was on this bus was to get to Nimbin and experience the hippy culture for themselves. Fred dropped us on the main street and gave us maps to navigate our way around. He told us in no uncertain terms that it was illegal to buy drugs in Nimbin. He told us to stay away from the police station. He told us where to eat in case we got the munchies.

That said, scoring drugs in Nimbin was a piece of cake...hash cake that is...or so I've heard ;)

There were so many dodgy characters walking around the streets it wasn't funny. They could smell a tourist a mile off, actually they probably just sit and watch for the Happy Coach to pull into town. Most people you walked passed were hissing an offer at you, it reminded me of Amsterdam.

We chatted to some Canadians who were on our bus and one guy had managed to get totally duped by a dealer. He bought some green play dough that was meant to be a cookie but smelt and tasted exactly like play dough. Disgusting.

Anyway, the tour was well worth the $25 we paid. It was the wackiest, zaniest bus ride I've ever had and although the bus was old and filthy, I sat deep in my seat and enjoyed the mellow vibes man...